Where to look at? What could one self be? What can easily be hidden from you?
Where will an unassuming look fall fruitless? Could it be made very easily far too complicated to be of any use in your life? Everything but practical that is.
Most ways of looking at yourself new age and the whole rest are just mostly mental or emotional musings of not too much worth:
You are all. You are every moment. You are even the moment within a moment. You are empty, nothing. Sacred, whole and unbroken, right my ass…. You are THE One… Just live in the moment and everything will be fine. If this is what you prefer, stop right here and leave. If that isn’t read on.
If you do read on, I will rely on an older article Nr. 1 written. Terms I don’t explain in this text are explained there.
The globe and it’s content the liquid:
Again I’ll rely on a model, only a model, not truth for truth’s sake. Take one big globe. Empty to begin with. At your birth, whatever your parents are and have been keeping themselves busy with will be filled into the new birth, globe, you. Their ideas, desires, fantasies, ethics and so on, which by being around them, or not in some cases, get fortified into who this new fledgling creature is to become, and yet no child is alike. Don’t forget though that your parents also had parents, who also had parents whom also had parents… Since we all stem from very few people we all in a way share the same characteristics. The closer you get in your lineage to your birth, the stronger the ties will be to you, how prevalent differing characteristics will be within this new globe. Inherited from parents and their life’s. You could say you are living the life, both your parent’s lived, who’s parents also interact in your life and so on. The further back you go the slighter and less prominent the traits will be, but they are there. Nothing get’s lost. You are one drop of the worst and best of human soup. You will find it all within you in different degrees of prevalence. The higher the parents level of being, self knowledge or whatever you wanna call it is, will inadvertently also influence the new child. Everything that comes into contact with you over the course of your life is put into your specific globe, as a liquid. A liquid can be first of all of a physical, emotional and mental nature. I’ll list some examples, just so you get a clearer image of them for yourself. Where else this may apply you may find yourself.
Φ Every item you take in your home. Every project you begin. Every dish uncleaned. Dust left behind when it ‘should’ be removed. Problems in your home or yourself you clearly can see with only your eyes, that some effort is needed. The eyes simply know. Repairs waiting to be done. Projects waiting to be finished, that could have been done already. (Some projects will run over months or years whether you want or not.)
Φ Emotional baggage from the past, not having put away to rest in complete understanding. Words left unspoken to those that matter. Honesty missing in relations where they are due. Breaks needing to happen. Tears needing to be shed. (Some emotional baggage needs time to be let go of, that’s no 60 second business.)
Φ All of your friendships. Family ties and relationships. Work relations. Your past experiences. Love relations and break ups.
Φ All of your habits. Daily rituals. Beliefs. Dreams and wants. Hobbies and dependencies.
Φ The problems you were born with and thus also your limitations that can’t really change. Not that they are only a problem. You can live quite well with your limitations.
How do we navigate all these liquids, our personal universe, which consists of everything entering our life?
By our attitudes which form over longer periods.
Our attitudes, which are created from believe and acting on that believe. It is based on continual repetition that can become so strong for it to seem unchangeable. We very often don’t even see our own attitudes anymore, because they have been so strongly naturalised, as to be invisible to our own self-image. Hence why some people don’t see their own behaviour when another person points at it with their fingers. Our behaviour gets put behind a veil. The stronger the attitudes set in, the impurities in the liquid get taken and form coherent crystals.
With this in mind, the crystals that have formed are like the stars you use to navigate your life with. Not all stars are equal. Not all stars lead you in a direction where you continually create a more living self, that can adapt to the constant changes being thrown at itself. (This constant drive can also be crystallised within you.) Being able to adapt to changes in and around you is someone who is alive, walking with grace. Someone who can’t deal anymore with changes becomes deader. Some people in this sense are dead zombies. Their whole vista of stars is based on undigested parts of life that have already shown themselves to be dead in relation to themselves. Their believes kept the dead parts ‘alive’. You will usually see someone stay practically the same over years, decades. A sign of living is slowly changing behaviour that has set in over longer time.
Impurities in the liquid:
I’ll also bring in problems in the list above that can appear of a mental, emotional or physical nature. A problem in a sense that it needs further attention and actions to be able to go on using them. Taking care of what may disappear out of your life or treated in such a way that it can continue being present in your life. These are the impurities in every liquid. The X and Y exist only in your globe, even though the outside exists as is. Their source can be X and Y or come out of your lineage, parents and grandparents and so on. In a perfect world each liquid would be of the same density. All life would flow smoothly and perfectly, for the one with clean liquids. There would be no reason whatsoever to change anything about life or yourself. Everything needing to be done would be done automatically. The impurities make the liquid more dense. Through Z living, the impurities get treated and dealt with. How this happen I’ll explain later on. I’ll also explain how this process can hinder your general life, because of (IF X THEN Y).
Over the course of your lifetime, as further ideas and ways of living get fed into your bowl the liquids can get more impure.
How is this globe navigated?
There is the big globe that encompasses all of these. You only see a part of these of yourself, so what you see right now is only a small collection of the totality that makes you up. This can be likened to a smaller ball within the globe. The moment you live in constitutes only of the ball and reality as is, the senses their filter, not the globe. The crystals only form within and around that ball. It more easily moves between less dense liquids. The denser the liquids get, the slower they pass through the ball. Most changes that happen automatically are with the least dense liquids, because the ball doesn’t retain the liquids. The ones most purified.
What if a new situation were to present itself, of which there exist no liquids, but there is already a common ground under all those liquids, and mostly purified liquids?
Certain events call up certain liquids that then enter your ball. No matter how dense the liquids are they all enter your ball. The denser they are, the longer they take to leave your ball again, only blocking your ball up further. Decreasing what you see of yourself further.
Only within the ball liquids can change of density. Z living makes the liquid less dense, lighter. (If X then Y) living makes the liquid denser, more impure. The impurities are the fuel that gets used for change to happen. Through Z living, the ball gets coated with the impurities, which slowly harden into crystals. Because the ball grows, it has more space for denser liquids, filled with more impurities which can then be made slowly lighter. As the ball grows, you begin seeing more of yourself, as there is more room to look at yourself. The moment doesn’t get bigger, there is just more room in your ball to notice different aspects hitherto unseen.
The crystallisation on the outside of the ball is like an unconscious way of living that much more easily deals with what has been made unconscious (behaviour itself will also change through further Z living). Because it is made unconscious your behaviour flows more naturally. Inside of you less hick ups and breaks happen until you begin doing. Which by itself stops the creation of further impurities in the liquid itself, which flow through the ball.
In any moment, within that ball, impurities can be dropped into the liquid, through (If X then Y) living. They aren’t only dropped into the liquids, but these impurities can also harden inside the ball, making the space to see yourself smaller, you notice less of your own behaviour, in a way becoming blinder to yourself and your behaviour. The more often you act impurely in your behaviour, the impurities settle inside the ball. It’s the attitude towards an activity that matters, not the activity itself. Keep in mind the impurities that harden inside or outside on the surface of the ball are the stars you navigate your life with. Someone who is dead to himself has no more room in his ball to see himself and thus less space is there for change in behaviour to happen.
Someone who becomes more alive as time passes has made his ball bigger, and more change can happen, because there is more space for change.
The crystals that are already set inside the ball can move to the outside on the surface, by breaking because you notice impurities inside your behaviour. Z looking at your behaviour, and intense suffering can break the crystals formed inside of you. Intense suffering seems to be an imperative for any searcher, they all find it, in life so no need to go look for it anywhere other than in life. After breaking the crystals, the impurities are dropped back into the liquid. Z looking at the ball can over time begin hardening these impurities on the outside enlarging what you can see at the moment of yourself.
The fuller the ball is inside with the crystals and the more dense liquids have passed through the ball, the less you see yourself for what you do.
To recapitulate. Dense liquids leave your ball slower. Light liquids enter and leave easier. Crystals on the inside of the ball decrease what you see of yourself. Crystals formed on the outside increase what you see of yourself. The bigger the ball the bigger the ability to change. The fuller the ball is inside the less room for change to happen. Change is actually real only when it has crystallised on the outside, because with it your actions change. The way to get there is by making the liquids more pure, less dense. This alone is the reason why working on yourself is not about everybody else, but only you. We all have different globes and different balls. The bigger someone else’s ball has become the bigger the influence may be on other people. Don’t forget though that all too often the growing on the outside entails the same growth inside, hence over time it becomes harder to further see the crystals growing just as strongly on the inside. By increasing your own ball is how change happens for other people. By keeping on looking inside on what may have grown, is how to further release impurities that can feed the outside later on.